JKAsiege

The texts can be grouped on purpose, texts A, B and D are all intended, primarily, to persuade. Text A is a poster about ‘Stronger Together’; it is designed to persuade people to get active within their communities by joining ‘Stronger Together’. You can tell this because of the problem solution discourse: “Do you want to have say on what happens where you live, and influence decisions that are made? Then why not get involved in Stronger Together Neighbourhoods in Warrington.” The first question is rhetorical, and then the second sentence, which is also a question, gives the reader a clear solution. Text A also uses synthetic personalisation, it assumes the problems they have to create a tenor between the reader and ‘Stronger Together’, such as where it says “There’s too much litter and dog mess...”, this strengthens the tenor because it is trying to be empathetic. The typography is also beneficial towards the persuasion techniques, where the ‘people of the community’ have written their problems, it looks as if the sticky notes and messages are actually handwritten, it also puts important information in bold, such as the contact details.

This is the opening for my English Language essay, the goal is to group the texts, but I can never get above a C grade in my work without resubmitting.

Not expecting many people to care, but any tips/feedback will be very much appreciated :thumbs up:

More of a math person, TBH.

~archi

h8 literature analyzation tbh imo atm

Turky wrote:h8 literature analyzation tbh imo atm

This isn't really literature, it's language features analysis.

Alright, first post.

It'd be helpful to know exactly what you've been asked to do in this task. It's easier to provide more detail knowing the questions and the texts involved. Anyway, if this is really supposed to be an essay and this is your introduction, you're putting too much in it. You shouldn't be analysing the texts to this extent in your introduction. The most you should be doing is making a broad statement dealing with what you've been asked and how these texts can be grouped. You then yews the body of your essay to clarify this statement. For most analyses dealing with a single text, it's appropriate to identify the contention of the text, the type of text, the author and the tone used.

I've completed some highlighting of certain things you should be looking at in terms of grammar and word usage:

The texts can be grouped on purpose, texts A, B and D are all intended, primarily, to persuade. Text A is a poster about ‘Stronger Together’; it is designed to persuade (You've said the same thing twice here) people to get active within their communities by joining ‘Stronger Together’. You (change this to 'the reader' or 'the viewer' or something similar) can tell this (This is a poor choice of words, perhaps you could replace 'tell' with 'identify', it makes your essay look more professional) because of the problem solution discourse: “Do you want to have say on what happens where you live, and influence decisions that are made? Then why not get involved in Stronger Together Neighbourhoods in Warrington.” The first question is rhetorical, and then the second sentence, which is also a question, gives the reader a clear solution.Text A also uses synthetic personalisation, it assumes the problems they have to create a tenor between the reader and ‘Stronger Together’, such as where it says “There’s too much litter and dog mess...”, this strengthens the tenor because it is trying to be empathetic. (Poor grammar, needs rewording) The typography is also beneficial towards the persuasion techniques, where the ‘people of the community’ have written their problems, it looks as if the sticky notes and messages are actually handwritten, it also puts important information in bold, such as the contact details (Irrelevant).

There are other, similar problems in there that I haven't highlighted but this should at least give you a head start in finding them.

In these essays, for some reason you do have to go straight into it, even in the introduction.

I agree with most of what you've said, but I've read over the 'poor grammar', and can't find anything wrong with it.

Other than that, I LOVE YOU! Thanks